A Broken Childhood: A True Story of Abuse is author Lydia Ola Taiwo’s account of the physical, mental, and emotional abuse she suffered at the hands of her parents from five to twelve-years-old. As a young girl, Lydia is loved and cared for by other caregivers during her childhood, but the abuse by her parents, mainly her mother, overshadows most of what was positive in the girl’s life. Like many survivors of abuse, Lydia still struggles to understand the reasons why her parents hurt her.
Born in Camberwell, London to parents of Nigerian descent, Lydia was sent to live in a foster home as an infant. This was a common practice among the Nigerian community at the time, allowing young parents to work and attend school without having to provide and pay for childcare. Lydia discovered later in her childhood that she has a younger sister who was also placed in a foster care home.
At the age of five, Lydia’s parents abruptly removed her from her loving foster home to live with them in a small, one-room apartment where she slept on the couch. The abuse began immediately. Lydia was left alone in the apartment often and when her parents were home very little was said to her that did not involve a command or a verbal lashing. The author writes extensively about the chores she was required to complete from a very young age including caring for her younger sister and brother, household chores, and meal preparation. Lydia is explicit in her descriptions of the injuries she acquired as a result of the physical abuse she endured: major head injuries, broken teeth, and scars all over her body from being lashed with an electrical cable that are still visible today.
Lydia’s accounts of her childhood are horrific and inspire anger in the reader. Even though the author expresses her on rage towards her parents, she also writes about the long journey to forgiveness: “There was a struggle going on inside me for many years, a struggle of revenge and hatred towards my mother and father—but one day I took a decision to forgive them for all they had done to me (88).” It is with a tone imbued with forgiveness that Lydia has written this book. The author’s story is an example of how a person who has been harmed can make a decision to release the anger so that her life can be defined by more than the abuse she survived.
A Broken Childhood is a tale of bravery by a survivor of child abuse that will speak to victims, caregivers, and child advocates alike. It is also a story of self preservation and forgiveness that any reader will be able to relate to.
Melissa Brown Levine
for
Independent Professional Book Reviewers
Review 2
Mojisola – known to everyone as Ola – was born to a Nigerian couple in London in 1964 and spent the first five years of her life in a foster home in Brighton. Here she was loved, looked after and lived her life in a genuinely good family. This wasn't an unusual arrangement as it allowed the biological parents to earn money without worrying about childcare – and Ola was happy. It was all the more cruel when her biological father arrived to take her 'home' for the weekend – a weekend which would stretch into seven years of abuse and neglect.
Lydia Ola Taiwo tells the story of her life – first in a cramped single room and then in a more spacious flat – with candour and an amazing lack of emotion, considering that she bears the scars of the many beatings she received to this day. Her father kicked her in the head (resulting in weeks away from school) but her mother's weapon of choice was electrical cabling – with the copper wires exposed. Although Ola thought that she was an only child she later discovered that she had a younger sister and a brother was born some years later. Unfortunately this meant that Ola had childcare responsibilities way beyond her years and her sister would have to carry a similar burden, resulting at one point in an horrific accident.At the age of twelve Ola and her sister were sent to live in Nigeria and they were to live there for three years without their parents. We're promised another book which will tell us about her time in Nigeria. Ola spent many years writing this slim volume and we can only hope that we don't have to wait so long to hear about Nigeria! Whilst the subject of A Broken Childhood does not make for easy reading, Ola's sparse and elegant writing is a pleasure to read.
For me the most amazing part about this book is that Ola feels able to forgive her parents for what they did to her – in fact she realised that this was necessary if she was to move on from what happened and live a normal, productive life. I was also shocked when I realised that her parents were professional people, who should have known better how to look after their children – and been able to put it into practice.
There's a useful list of contacts at the back of the book if child abuse is suspected. I could hope that it will not be much needed, but sadly I fear that this will not be the case.
I'd like to thank the author for sending a copy to the Bookbag.
Abuse of children is not unusual, and we recently read of the experiences of Anna Burley in Bipolar Parent.
You can read more book reviews and buy A Broken Childhood
Sue Magee
Review 3
In Your Face
You might have to grit your teeth to start reading this. But it's worth it. The book is a frank and painfully honest account of a little girl's brutalization by her parents -- an opening of the heart including the thousand and one ways to cover up to authority for unaccountable bruises and injuries. Essential reading for any professional in the childcare field, I would suggest. And for the rest of us, the book is curiously morish. In-your-face, written with all the naivety of a small child, the author tells her story with fascinating power. Small p.s.: I would have liked something more on those shadowy dark figures of Lydia Ola Taiwo's parents. How can adults behave like that?
Hope your operation went well.
Cheers, Dexter Tiranti
You might have to grit your teeth to start reading this. But it's worth it. The book is a frank and painfully honest account of a little girl's brutalization by her parents -- an opening of the heart including the thousand and one ways to cover up to authority for unaccountable bruises and injuries. Essential reading for any professional in the childcare field, I would suggest. And for the rest of us, the book is curiously morish. In-your-face, written with all the naivety of a small child, the author tells her story with fascinating power. Small p.s.: I would have liked something more on those shadowy dark figures of Lydia Ola Taiwo's parents. How can adults behave like that?
Hope your operation went well.
Cheers, Dexter Tiranti
Review 4
This book should be required reading for every social worker in the country.
A Broken Childhood is the true story of the author's abused and neglected childhood. It is also an insight to what happens when two different cultures meet and clash in a way that is not properly understood by either party. It is not an easy book to read – I found the chapter where the author describes how she received her head injury particularly disturbing – nevertheless it is one that should be read by anyone who has anything to do with children: be they teachers, social workers, childminders or carers. The book describes (sometimes in graphic detail) what it's like to be on the receiving end of a continuous stream of physical and psychological abuse; something which, thankfully, most people never experience and have little or no knowledge of.
There is an old saying: “What doesn't kill you makes you stronger” and A Broken Childhood is certainly a testament to the strength and resilience of the human spirit. The author's inner strength, forged in the furnace of her violent upbringing, shines through from every page. The fact that she now shows her tormentors forgiveness rather than seeking revenge speaks volumes.
At times during her childhood, Ola would wonder why God was letting her suffer in this way. What part of His divine plan did it serve? Perhaps this book is the answer. To tell the world what it is like. To tell fellow sufferers they are not alone. To tell those who should know, what to look for. To stop it happening to anyone else.
A Broken Childhood is the true story of the author's abused and neglected childhood. It is also an insight to what happens when two different cultures meet and clash in a way that is not properly understood by either party. It is not an easy book to read – I found the chapter where the author describes how she received her head injury particularly disturbing – nevertheless it is one that should be read by anyone who has anything to do with children: be they teachers, social workers, childminders or carers. The book describes (sometimes in graphic detail) what it's like to be on the receiving end of a continuous stream of physical and psychological abuse; something which, thankfully, most people never experience and have little or no knowledge of.
There is an old saying: “What doesn't kill you makes you stronger” and A Broken Childhood is certainly a testament to the strength and resilience of the human spirit. The author's inner strength, forged in the furnace of her violent upbringing, shines through from every page. The fact that she now shows her tormentors forgiveness rather than seeking revenge speaks volumes.
At times during her childhood, Ola would wonder why God was letting her suffer in this way. What part of His divine plan did it serve? Perhaps this book is the answer. To tell the world what it is like. To tell fellow sufferers they are not alone. To tell those who should know, what to look for. To stop it happening to anyone else.
Shaun Pearce
Review 5
I found it to be a painful read, but very compelling. In my view you have developed a powerful writing style to convey your experiences, and the succinct descriptions and overall brevity give a sense of stoic understatement which I think works very well.
As a resident of Hastings (since the mid 1980s) it was poignant to read of the good times you experienced here.
The biggest question I was left with at the end of the book, relates to what understanding you have developed as to why your parents (particulary your mother) were so violently cruel. I read with interest your process of forgiveness, and wonder, whether or not for you, developing understanding is a necessary part of that process.
Please do not feel obliged to reply to this quetion, as I respect your privacy on the matter. However if you are willing to share your thoughts about this, I would be interested to hear.
Again, many congratulations for writing such a powerful book, and for your resilience.
As a resident of Hastings (since the mid 1980s) it was poignant to read of the good times you experienced here.
The biggest question I was left with at the end of the book, relates to what understanding you have developed as to why your parents (particulary your mother) were so violently cruel. I read with interest your process of forgiveness, and wonder, whether or not for you, developing understanding is a necessary part of that process.
Please do not feel obliged to reply to this quetion, as I respect your privacy on the matter. However if you are willing to share your thoughts about this, I would be interested to hear.
Again, many congratulations for writing such a powerful book, and for your resilience.
Very best wishes,
Peter Dale